Who will be next on Theo's chopping block?

With Cub Nation remembering all the good times of the Mike Quade era and having the sudden urge to drop whatever is in your hands or take a walk, we begin to wonder what Epstein & Co.'s next move will be, and who will be the next in what you would assume is the beginning of the new regime's effort to clean house. With Ramirez leaving and Dempster picking up his own option, that leaves the Cubs with two deadweight contracts that seem to be good options to try to move before spring training. One of which is this guy:

The embodiment of cool, calm, and collected.

Zambrano, much like Ramirez, has been with the team for the better part of 10 years. But he has also provided more regrettable and "negative press" type moments than he's turned in memorable performances, obviously excluding his no hitter a few years back. On the books for $18MM, with the reputation of a cancer and in desperate need for a fresh start, he has to be target #1 to get the axe. I personally think he will end up with the Yankees, the team with the financial means to eat a decent portion of his contract, the need to fill in their rotation, as well as the no-bullshit culture that may straighten him out and let his talent come through. No one denies that he can be a staple in any rotation in the bigs, but his mental makeup has been a drag on what could have been a hugely successful career on the North Side. Ultimately, the negatives outweigh the positives with him and I think Theo looks to move him ASAP.

The other, more complicated piece of the puzzle is Soriano. Personally, watching him swing and miss on breaking balls in the dirt every single game for the past few few years has been fucking infuriating. Frankly I'm surprised he sees any other pitch besides a slider low and away. The following image is emblazoned into my brain:

Look familiar?

Last year, his 26 homers were overshadowed by his abysmal .289 OBP. Surprisingly, his strikeout numbers dropped from 123 to 113. Not to be deterred, he still managed to rank 28th in Ks and 58th in pitches per plate appearance in the NL. Any move Theo makes with Soriano will involve an American League club. He's quintessential DH material as he continues to age and his defense declines. He will be tougher to move than Zambrano and based on what he's already said, Epstein & Co. may decide to hang on to him and see what he's got left in the tank. I'm sure a lot of people, myself included, are crossing their fingers hoping that he gets moved as well. I would rather give Colvin or another young guy his ABs rather than watch him swing and miss for another season. 

Quade getting fired is part of the symbolic overhaul of the franchise. We're saddled with a few bad contracts right now and I think that Theo will think long and hard about each players' individual worth to the team and weigh that against what it is that player is making next season and in the seasons to come. Zambrano and Soriano seem like logical pieces to move and I wouldn't be surprised if management decides to move them sooner rather than later.